Mothers and young kids stay together in Bangor residential treatment facility

BANGOR, Maine (WABI) - Ask any parent- being a new mom is stressful.

Now imagine being a pregnant or new mom, while trying to recover from addiction.

Motivation to want to get sober often comes the moment someone becomes a parent.

But that road to recovery can be daunting, especially if mothers are separated from their children.

A residential treatment facility in Bangor offers a unique program that works to preserve the parenting bond.

“The Wellspring Infinity House is a four to six month residential substance use disorder treatment program for pregnant women and mothers in recovery from addiction.”

Alisha Goss is the program manager for Wellspring’s Infinity House in Bangor, It is one of a few long term residential treatment program in Maine that allows children five and under, to stay with their moms.

Goss calls it a judgment free zone.

“This is where shame comes to die,” she says. “Just because they’re a mom doesn’t make them a bad person for struggling with addiction.”

Miranda Snowdon was pregnant with her son, Landon when she first came to Infinity House.

“I’m ashamed to admit that I did use throughout my pregnancy,” she says. “And unfortunately the department did step in and place him in a foster family for a short period of time. And I say that because it was due to my being here at the Infinity House and getting clean, I got him back within 30 days. Infinity House truly saved my life.”

While living at the house, a parent coach stays with the children during times when mothers are working on their recovery as well as developing healthy life skills.

“It’s really a well rounded program that doesn’t only offer support to moms in recovery but also offers support to the parenting process and the children as well,” Goss explains.

Erin Moore arrived at Infinity House more than 100 days ago. The mother of two says she attended her first AA meeting when she was just 25 years old.

“We don’t do think because we woke up one day and thought- this will be a great way to spend my life,” says Moore. “We didn’t do this in one day.”

Moore has been through other recovery programs, but says having her daughter with her makes all the difference.

“In recovery, you do have to be selfish and put yourself first. but as a mom, we don’t know how to do that,” she notes.

Goss acknowledges mothers, in particular, seem to be more stigmatized when it comes to substance use disorders.

“Because society sees moms as providers,” she says. “People that are supposed to be there and take care of their kids no matter what happens. And the reality is- addiction doesn’t discriminate.”

“Taking away that fear of asking for help- I can not say that enough, adds Moore. ” I’ve never been in a place with staff like this. That truly care. And you can tell the way that they talk to you that their hearts break when your heart is breaking. And when you’re excited, they’re even more excited. Here we talk about the spiritual side, the mental side, the emotional side, the physical side of all of it. You have to cover all of those or you’re going to end up relapsing.”

These women know the odds are stacked against them. According to the National Institute on Drug Abuse, between 40-60% of those in treatment, will relapse.

Snowdon was one of them.

“I did end up losing Landon again,” she says, recalling that time. “And, I knew who to call- Infinity.”

The second time around, Snowdon says she was able to regain custody of her son in 60 days.

“Knowing that he is there and he needs me,” she says. “And I’m lucky enough to be there with him. It’s just a huge motivation.”

Moore is now taking college courses so she can help others struggling with addiction.

“Just because it looks like your life is perfect on Facebook, does not mean your life is perfect,” she says. “We’re just being the brave ones and standing up and saying- this is what we needed to do. This is the first time, in a very long time, that I said out loud- I am proud of myself. That my family is proud of me again.”

“If we can help heal families with support from the communities, we’re doing not just a service to the clients themselves, but a service to the entire community and future generations,” adds Goss. “I’ve seen it change countless lives. It’s a beautiful thing to watch. And it’s a beautiful thing to be a part of.”

Wellspring Maine is a non-profit agency which means they rely on help from the community.

There are several ways to do that- everything from monetary donations to baby wipes and diapers.

Log onto WellspringMaine.com and click on the donate button for more information.

If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction and you would like to know more about all of the detox programs available at Wellspring including the Infinity House, you can call them at 941-1612.

Crossroads, in Windham is another Mainecare agency that allows women and children to stay together. And soon, so will Tessa’s House in Knox County.